


I'm Soft!

by Ghostinthehouse



Series: Demon and Angel Professors [95]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Ableism, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Professors, Disabled Crowley (Good Omens), Discussion of Trigger Warnings, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Intimidation, M/M, Mentioned Beelzebub (Good Omens), Mentioned Gabriel (Good Omens), Other, intimidation tactics, threatening behaviour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:35:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24789337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghostinthehouse/pseuds/Ghostinthehouse
Summary: Dr Fell bustled cheerfully around his classroom, handing out the course information and touching on the important points out loud. "Lessons will include..."
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Demon and Angel Professors [95]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1412962
Comments: 50
Kudos: 969
Collections: Aspec-friendly Good Omens





	I'm Soft!

Dr Fell bustled cheerfully around his classroom, handing out the course information and touching on the important points out loud. "Lessons will include warnings for common triggers ahead of time, the list of which you can find at the top of page 3, and if you look further down the page, you will find a link to anonymously request and specify additional ones to be included. Now for our first lesson..."

"Trigger warnings are junk," somebody groused from the depths of the group, muttering on about how they were no more than a pretence, that nobody actually needed them, until Dr Fell puttered over and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Excuse me, dear, but you seem to be saying your thoughts out loud. We can all hear you, and I'd hate to have to embarrass you with a trigger warning all of your own."

"And if I say I'm 'triggered' by so-called trigger warnings?" The student raised his chin defiantly, as if he'd played a trump card.

"Paul, isn't it? That, I believe, falls under 'conflicting needs' and the presence of an accessibility aid is taken as preferable to the absence of one. Page 12. You are welcome to transfer, if you find a teacher who will comply with your needs, but in my lessons, there will be warnings."

The boy, Paul, unfolded from his seat, as wide as Dr Fell, and several inches taller, and leaned in far too close, sneering right into Dr Fell's face, "Trigger warnings make you  _soft_ !"

Dr Fell didn't budge so much as a hair, just produced a slight, steely, smile back at him, as if he was fully accustomed to being loomed over. "I'm quite content to be soft. My husband, Anthony, likes me just as I am."

"If you're so soft, why aren't you moving?" he grumbled, not quite quietly enough.

"You appear to be confusing 'soft' with 'compliant'." Dr Fell tutted gently at the boy's mistake, and proceeded to spell out the difference in precise, pedantic, and lengthy detail, concluding, "And now, you mustn't debate this any longer or you'll be late for your next class. Run along, dear."

* * *

At home later, with a cup of tea in his hands, Aziraphale grumbled, "Why is it, that I can say, 'These scissors are razor-edged and may hurt you, please handle with care' and nobody yells about how I'm banning scissors, but the moment I say, 'This piece of writing is razor-edged and may hurt you, please handle with care' people start yelling about me banning it? I don't quite see the difference."

Crowley cradled a glass of whisky for himself. "Nobody denies metal is sharp, angel. But s'long as someone can persuade themselves that something isn't harmful, they can continue doing that thing without feeling guilty."

"Oh, yes, giving warnings about it would rather put the kibosh on that wouldn't it?"

"And while we're on words, angel, we have a problem. Gabriel and Bee are - having a rumour contest. Gabriel's putting it about that," Crowley swallowed a mouthful of whisky, and folded his body tight back against the end of the sofa, "that I'm the one who's been hurting and brainwashing you, and he's the one that's trying to get you safe - with him. Bee is doing something similar, only ze has it that _you're_ hurting _me_ , and only pretending to be nice."

Aziraphale went very still for a long moment, and then broke out of it to swipe Crowley's glass and down some of the whisky himself. "I see," he said eventually. "Well. We can't be having with that, can we, dearest?"

Crowley sagged into the cushions as the tension went out of him and made a half-hearted sound of protest at losing his glass. "No. But - you know the students will believe it. Gabriel's especially. It feeds right into my reputation, only..."

Aziraphale refilled the glass, handed it back, and eased close enough to wrap an arm round Crowley's unresisting shoulders. "We'll manage. We always do."


End file.
